Dan
of course Flatres #crabclaws and fat black nurses.

    Can someone help me outwith sending private messages to forum members. a proper abc guide on how to do it.

    • C_J replied to this.

      Thanks cj. i’m such a fucking primate.

      EraserOfLove It was my office xmas party last night

      I can honestly say i’d rather be paralysed with GHB mainlined into my gooch laying on an offcut of MFI underlay in the basement of john wayne gacey’s Ranch, while he’s on the mooch for hairless puckered arseholes to violate, than go to another .

      I’d rather be Hugh Grants walnut turned fleurs-de-lys strap-on plunging helplessley into some sundry Bronx prostitutes dirtbox like a f ucked chernobyl graphite rod , than ever go to another office xmas party. I’ve had more fun whacking me meatus between two B&Q sanding blocks.

      Problem is , i only meet the people i work with a couple of times a year and then we are thrust into a room every december and told to socialise to a soundtrack of Greg lake and Jona louie while being plied with booze. It’s like some crazed GDR social experiment at the Trabant works factory.

      My hangover was so evil I threw up in morning for the first time since Terry mcCann had furry dice in his Mk2 capri. I had the shakes like Nicholas cage in ‘leaving las Vagas’. I was shuffling about the house like a short eye nonce on E wing with the tea urn.

      I hurled back up two milk thistle tablets and My berroca drink. i’ll probably still be processing the toxins for 3 months. My only task today was to take in the 11am shop from ocado. The thought of dealing with this seems gargantuan.

      ’er indoors is most impressed. Called me a ‘peg toothed cunt ’ before she left for venice.

      True Romance.

      Think i’ll give it a miss next year.

      Lol!

        10 days later

        EraserOfLove

        Yes!

        Do you have a tune of the year? Or do you see that most stuff today pales in comparison to The Prog Golden Yearsâ„¢ ?

          hugo… you make me chuckle.I’m a simple man of simple means.. i remember when Millsy posted Phon.o - ‘Schn33’ which is now 10 years old yet i still regard as a cutting edge modern day classic. It’s all about the golden age..

          I’ve Done 9pints of draft Superbock at the LLoyds of London Christmas old boys reunion do tonight at leadenhall market and i wrenched open the petty cash tin in the Office by the lutine to the tune of £360 to spunk up on Petrol washed chisel.

          I then fingered the Congolese office cleaner as the guilty party. After all, ‘my word is my bond’.. On the way home to leigh on sea on the train i played cm -‘dream universe’ on me headphones. I was very happy and tucked into my petrol washed flake with glee. I leave modern day electronica to you lads on here to educate me.

          Lets get on it hugo!

            also lads Having lost 40% of my bonus in taxes today, I would dearly love to ask jeremy hunt one question…

            ie. …what is the structural integrity and weight bearing percentile load, including contingencies, of your wifes arsehole when placed under extreme distress by a Winston Silcotts Glandis whose hung like a victorian Wrought Iron Carpet bolster charged up on amyl nitrate?. You fucking thief.

              Superbock lager tastes like Ronnie Krays steradent after leaving his false teeth in a glass following a night sucking off the meat rack in Piccadilly.

              EraserOfLove All good lads?.

              The Eagles are blowing a fantastic season and the future is now uncertain. No mate. I am not alright.

                  Dan me and you dan.. Lets dance together in the brit funk minefield. Iou freeze..