Stupid Things You Heard Today

jonattonyeah

Had a co-worker say, “well a broken clock is right once a day” on a conference call. All proud like. He’s a decision-maker here at the health department. We’re all doomed.

303abuser

maybe he’s got a 24 hour clock.

jonattonyeah

Yeah, yeah, but that’s not the fucking saying. And this is ’merica. 24 hours clocks, the metric system, and spelling it “Catsup” is communist.

bosstrabs

jonattonyeah I have ONLY ever seen Americans spell it ‘Catsup’.

Firstly, on those old cartoons with Elmer Fudd and shit in. Even though I was about 7 years old I was like ‘What the fuck is that?’

Then, when I went to Florida when I was about 13, in a diner.

303abuser

haha you’re not wrong.

-si-

What is catsup, chaps?

Christian

my 75 year old mum who is in isolation apart from her daily delivery of the daily mail has come out with some corkers.

firstly, when the lockdown has finished it will change the way in which the minorties are viewed, especially vegans.

which was swiftly followed by the number of people asking for the pubs to be reopened are all thugs. They just want to go and get tanked up then come home and beat up their wives. however she sees no issue with garden centres being allowed open

hugopal

Christian is/was your father a bit of a boozehound then?

-si-

A punch in the face from a drunken partner is significantly better than getting buried under some new flagstones an outdoor loving partner bought at the garden centre!

Millsy

-si- lol. Fred West never touched a drop!

-si-

Millsy

He was a gifted horticulturalist and paving stone layer though, millsy!

mono-stereo

-si- imagine how entertaining Gardeners’ World would have been had Fred gotten the gig.

Along_the_Wire

I’ve just got off a Zoom meeting where a sales director claimed that him and his team were going ‘gunbusters’ in June. Stupid twat.

Luckily for him, his comment largely fell on death ears.

vinnyt77

Our Chief Sales Officer will NOT stop saying, “We can’t let perfect be the enemy of progress”

Every time - I want to punch his stupid little face.

Millsy

mono-stereo lol. “Fred, how did you get those roses to bloom so magnificently?”
“I raped and murdered at least 12 young women with the help of my second wife, Rosemary. I then buried them in my border.”
“Chuckles Thanks Fred, next up we hear from Biddy Baxter and her take on the traditional English Cottage Garden.”

-si-

mono-stereo

Lol, not sure monty don would have lasted this long had fred and rose fronted the show for a series or two!

mono-stereo

Millsy

LOL

Christian

nope never. he enjoyed going to the pub in the same way her dad would go to the pub, and neither of them were in for a bit of “does as your told” when they got back.
since being in isolaion this her new formed view, but it is fine for people to go to garden centres rather than beer gardens

Millsy

FranklinHyde Poor Ed

Smallman1

Millsy Poor Ed

Que?

TankTop

Heard someone in his 50’s on a podcast recently refer to himself as an “escape goat” for something that had happened.

bosstrabs

TankTop Recently read Amps refer to ‘gorilla’ warfare and ‘pop shots’. Still not sure he even realises these are errors.

hugopal

This appeared on my street recently.

It seems some others nearby are more accepting than me of those incapable of logical reasoning.