Smallman1 I’ll put it this way, when she left mine ay 9am the following morning, I thought it had gone well.
That 9am conversation in full…
Doris rings Smallman’s door bell.
Next door apartment dweller: Yes?
Doris: Is this Ed’s flat?
Next door apartment dweller: Just bang on his fucking door, his doorbell is still wired up here.
Doris: Why?
Next door apartment dweller: Because he’s a fucking retard.
Doris bangs on door.
Ed: Ah yes, your purse.
Doris: Thanks, so nice of you to wait around for me to come and pick it up. I don’t know how it fell out of my bag in the taxi, but luckily you noticed it after I got out!
Ed: No problem at all.
Doris: Can I give you half the taxi fare?
Ed: No, it’s on me.
Doris: Aw, you’re so sweet Edward.
Ed [stammering]: You’re a ten!
Doris: [backing off down the driveway] You’re erm… at least a… seven! Anyway got to go! By the way, do you know you have a huge hole in your roof?
Ed: Yeah, I know.
Ed closes the door.
Ed [to himself]: Well, that went well.
