• General

  • FAO to the A to the O of Sean of Rhouses

“WHERES MY FUCKING POPPADOMS, YOU CUNTS?”

bosstrabs Just discovered I have a Michelin-starred Indian in my neighbourhood!

rhouses There is no way that restaurant is Michelin starred going by the pictures.

Aww bless, Dave thinks that a restaurant being listed in the Michelin guide must mean it has a star!

The restaurant is clearly listed, but also has not been awarded a star (as should be obvious to anyone actually familiar with such things by the lack of * star on the listing).

      On another note, as I’d already posted in one of Dave’s other threads on China, the general standard of food is probably so low that likely anywhere which doesn’t instantaneously give you salmonella/norovirus/botulism etc. automatically gets listed.
      There’s some proper fucking shite looking places listed for Beijing, including that Indian gaffe.

      Here are some more tempting looking places:

      https://guide.michelin.com/en/beijing-municipality/beijing/restaurant/liu-quan-ju

      https://guide.michelin.com/en/beijing-municipality/beijing/restaurant/jingyi

      bosstrabs Invite sent, Hugo!

      To Aspergers School.

      If “Bants School” is where you supposedly learn to have bants, then “Aspergers School” would be where you supposedly learn to have aspergers - so you saying you’ve sent me an invite would mean you don’t think I already have aspergers, which is a change of tune for you!

          bosstrabs I’d send you an invite to some kind of culinary tasting course, but such a thing won’t exist in China; it appears the only schools you can attend there are state-sponsored “re-education camps”.

            hugopal Correct Hugo, I think you have autism but not full blown ASPERGERS. Just like you have HIV but not full blown AIDS yet.

                bosstrabs Correct Hugo, I think you have autism but not full blown ASPERGERS. Just like you have HIV but not full blown AIDS yet.

                Considering you’ve probably contracted full blown AIDS from your dodgy Chinese hookers I bet you’re aware of all the signs.

                  I wouldn’t be surprised if Raj in Beijing served crow in that jalfrezi Dave ordered.

                    rhouses Don’t worry, I smashed up their restaurant anyway and left some racist graffiti on the doors.

                      Dave has defo had some dog in his Rogan Josh takeaway from Raj in Beijing.

                        Can’t have been that good as you haven’t mentioned it.

                        Also, chicken instead of lamb for a jalfrezi? Oh dear.

                        rhouses Find me a good Indian in Beijing.

                        It’s a city of 20 million people, there must be an absolutely boss Indian here.

                            Bet someone does a mean Chicken feet Biriani or Bat Tikka Masala. Filthy bastards 🤮

                            bosstrabs The only countries I’d proactively want to eat Indian food would be England, Malaysia and the UAE. I’d say Singapore as well, but that would be a complete waste of a holiday.

                            Will see if there are any options worth visiting in Beijing when I’m bumming around on the internet. Raj is certainly not it.

                            But surely you should limit options to Spanish and Italian when you’re out there. I say this rolling my eyes.

                                rhouses Rhouses, don’t be a fuckin bollix as your namesake would say.

                                Yeah, I’ll fucking fly to Malaysia just because I fancy a decent Indian.

                                Why don’t you stop banging on about my choice of Indian and help me find a decent one? Do something fucking useful for once. Someone (me) is kind enough to ask your spasticated brain for some advice and get yourself some kudos and you just go “mmmeehnenn I’d probably eat in UAE of Malaysia”.